How can I make the most of the rest of my Life?

We only get one life. We might wish for more. D. H. Lawrence said, ‘If only one could have two lives. The first in which to make one’s mistakes . . . and the second in which to profit by them.’ But there are no dress rehearsals for life; we are on stage straightaway.

Even if we have made mistakes in the past, it is possible with God’s help to make something of what is left. Paul tells us in Romans 12:1-2 how we can do this.

Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God – which is your spiritual worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.

WHAT SHOULD WE DO?

I) Break with the past

As Christians we are called to be different from the world around us. Paul writes, ‘Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world’ (by which he means the world that has shut God out). Or as J. B. Phillips translates this verse, ‘Don’t let the world around you squeeze you into its own mould’. This is not easy; there is a pressure to conform, to be like everybody else. It is very hard to be different.

A young police officer was taking his final exam at Hendon Police College in north London. Here is one of the questions:

You are on patrol in outer London when an explosion occurs in a gas main in a nearby street. On investigation you find that a large hole has been blown in the footpath and there is an overturned van lying nearby. Inside the van there is a strong smell of alcohol. Both occupants – a man and a woman – are injured. You recognise the woman as the wife of your Divisional Inspector, who is at present away in the USA. A passing motorist stops to offer you assistance and you realise that he is a man who is wanted for armed robbery. Suddenly a man runs out of a nearby house, shouting that his wife is expecting a baby and that the shock of the explosion has made the birth imminent. Another man is crying for help, having been blown into an adjacent canal by the explosion, and he cannot swim.
Bearing in mind the provisions of the Mental Health Act, describe in a few words what actions you would take.

The officer thought for a moment, picked up his pen, and wrote: ‘I would take off my uniform and mingle with the crowd.’

We can sympathise with his answer. As a Christian, it is often easier to take off our Christian uniform and ‘mingle with the crowd’. But we are called to remain distinctive, to retain our Christian identity, wherever we are and whatever the circumstances.

A Christian is called to be a chrysalis rather than a chameleon. A chrysalis is a pupa which turns into a beautiful butterfly. A chameleon is a lizard with the power to change colour: many can assume shades of green, yellow, cream or dark brown. It is popularly thought to change colour to match its background. Similarly, chameleon Christians merge with their surroundings, happy to be Christians in the company of other Christians, but willing to change their standards in an environment which is not Christian. Legend has it that an experiment was carried out on a chameleon. It was put on a tartan background, could not take the tension, and exploded! The chameleon Christian experiences an almost unbearable tension in his or her life and, unlike the chrysalis Christian, does not reach his or her potential.

Christians are not called to fit in with their background, but to be different. Being different does not mean being odd. We are not called to wear weird clothes or to start speaking in a peculiar religious language. We can be normal! The abnormality that some people feel to be a necessary part of Christianity is complete nonsense. Indeed, a relationship with God through Jesus should bring integration to our personalities. The more like Jesus we become, the more ‘normal’ we become – in the sense that we become more fully human.

When we follow Christ, we are free to shed patterns and habits that bring us and others down. For example, it means that we should no longer indulge in character assassination behind people’s backs. It means we do not need to spend our time grumbling and complaining (if that is what we were like before). It means that we are free not to conform to the world’s standards of sexual morality. This might all sound very negative, but it should not be so. Rather than being backbiters, we should be encouragers, constantly looking to build others up out of love for them. Rather than grumbling and complaining, we should be full of thankfulness and joy. Rather than indulging in sexual immorality, we should be demonstrating the blessing of keeping God’s standards.

This latter example is one area where Christians are called to be different, but which many find difficult. In my experience of speaking about the Christian faith there is one subject which arises time and time again – the whole question of sexual morality. Questions most frequently asked in this area are, ‘What about sex outside marriage? Is it wrong? Where does it say so in the Bible? Why is it wrong?’

God’s pattern here, as elsewhere, is far superior to any other. God invented marriage. He also invented sex. He is not, as some seem to think, looking down in astonishment and saying, ‘Oh my goodness, whatever will they think of next?’ C. S. Lewis pointed out that pleasure is God’s idea, not the devil’s. The Bible affirms our sexuality. God made us sexual beings and designed our bodies for our enjoyment. The Bible celebrates sexual intimacy. In the Song of Songs we see the delight, contentment and satisfaction it brings.

The inventor of sex also tells us how it can be enjoyed to the full. The biblical context of sexual intercourse is the lifelong commitment in marriage between one man and one woman. The Christian doctrine is set out in Genesis 2:24 and quoted by Jesus in Mark 10:7 – ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ Marriage involves the public act of leaving parents and making a lifelong commitment. It involves being ‘united’ with one’s partner – the Hebrew word meaning literally ‘glued’ together – not just physically and biologically, but emotionally, psychologically, spiritually and socially. This is the Christian context of the ‘one flesh’ union. The biblical doctrine of marriage is the most exciting, thrilling and positive view of marriage that exists. It sets before us God’s perfect plan.

God warns of the danger of going outside the boundaries he has laid down. There is no such thing as ‘casual sex’. Every act of sexual intercourse effects a ‘one flesh’ union (1 Corinthians 6:13-20). When this union is broken people get hurt. If you glue two pieces of card together and then pull them apart, you can hear the sound of ripping and see that bits of each are left behind on the other. Similarly, becoming one flesh and then being torn apart leaves scars. We leave broken bits of ourselves in broken relationships. All around us we see what happens when God’s standards are ignored. We see broken marriages, broken hearts, hurt children, sexual disease, and those whose lives are in a mess. On the other hand, in so many Christian marriages where God’s standards are kept, we see the blessing that God intended to bestow on the whole area of sex and marriage. Of course, it is never too late. God’s love through Jesus can bring forgiveness, heal scars and restore wholeness to lives that have been torn apart. But it is far better to avoid the necessity of such measures.

So, let us not allow the world to squeeze us into its mould. Let us show the world something far, far better.

II) Make a new start !

Paul says we are to ‘be transformed’ (Romans 12:2). In other words, we are to be like the chrysalis which changes into a beautiful butterfly. Many are fearful of change in their life: two caterpillars sitting on a leaf saw a butterfly passing by. One turned to the other and said, ‘You won’t catch me going up in one of those!’

Such is our fear of leaving behind what we know.

God does not ask us to leave behind anything that is good. But he does ask us to get rid of the rubbish. Until we leave the rubbish behind we cannot enjoy the wonderful things God has for us.
There was a woman who lived on the streets. She would ask for money and react aggressively to those who refused. She walked the streets for years, accompanied by a mass of plastic bags. When she died, there were in fact several well-dressed people at the service. It turned out that this woman had inherited a large fortune. She had acquired a luxurious flat and many valuable paintings, but she chose to live on the streets with her plastic bags full of rubbish. She could not bring herself to leave her lifestyle, and she never enjoyed her inheritance.

As Christians we have inherited far more –. In order to enjoy these treasures, we have to leave behind the rubbish in our lives. Scripture tells us to ‘hate what is evil’ (v. 9). That is what must be left behind.

In the verses that follow (Romans 12:9-21) we get a glimpse of some of those treasures to be enjoyed:

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another with mutual affection. Honour one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervour, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God’s people who are in need. Practise hospitality.

Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.

Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord. On the contrary: ‘If your enemies are hungry, feed them; if they are thirsty, give them something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on their heads.’ Do not overcome by evil; but overcome evil with good.

The Greek word for ‘sincere’ means ‘without hypocrisy’, or literally ‘without play acting’ or ‘without a mask’. Often, relationships in the world are quite superficial. We all put up fronts to protect ourselves. I certainly did before I was a Christian (and it carried on to some extent afterwards – though it shouldn’t have). I said, in effect, ‘I don’t really like what I am inside, so I will pretend I am somebody different.’

If other people are doing the same then there are two ‘fronts’ or ‘masks’ meeting. The real people never meet. This is the opposite of ‘sincere love’. Sincere love means taking off our masks and daring to reveal who we are. When we know that God loves us as we are, we are set free to take off our masks. This means that there is a completely new depth in our relationships.

Sometimes people are cynical about enthusiasm, but there is nothing wrong with it. There is a joy and excitement, a ‘spiritual fervour’ (v. 11) which comes from our relationship with God. This initial experience of Christ is meant to last, and not to peter out. Paul says, ‘Never be lacking in zeal,’ but, ‘keep your spiritual fervour, serving the Lord.’ The longer we have been Christians, the more enthusiastic we should be.

The NT urges Christians to live in harmony with one another and to be generous (v. 13), hospitable (v. 13), forgiving (v. 14), empathetic (v. 15), and to live at peace with everyone (v. 18). It is a glorious picture of the Christian family into which God calls us, beckoning us into an atmosphere of love, joy, patience, faithfulness, generosity, hospitality, blessing, rejoicing, harmony, humility and peace; where good is not overcome by evil, but evil is overcome by good. These are some of the treasures in store when we leave behind the rubbish.

HOW DO WE DO IT?

‘Present your bodies . . .’
This requires an act of the will. Paul commands us, in view of everything that God has done for us, to offer our bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God (Romans 12:1). God wants us to offer all of ourselves and all of our lives.

First, we offer our time. Our time is our most valuable possession and we need to give God all of it. This does not mean we spend all of it in prayer and Bible study, but that we allow his priorities to be established in our lives. (Two guys saying prayers at night)

It is easy to get our priorities wrong. An advertisement appeared in a newspaper: ‘Farmer seeks lady with tractor with view to companionship and possible marriage. Please send picture – of tractor.’ I don’t think the farmer had his priorities quite right. Our priorities must be our relationships, and our number one priority is our relationship with God. We need to set aside time to be alone with him. We also need to set aside time to be with other Christians – on Sundays and perhaps some mid-week meeting where we can encourage one another.

Secondly, we need to offer our ambitions to the Lord, saying to him, ‘Lord, I trust you with my ambitions and hand them over to you.’ He asks us to seek his kingdom and his righteousness as our foremost ambition and then he promises to meet all our other needs (Matthew 6:33). This does not necessarily mean that our former ambitions disappear; they may become secondary to Christ’s ambitions for us. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be successful in our job, provided that our motivation in everything is seeking his kingdom and his righteousness, and that we use what we have for his glory.

Thirdly, we need to offer him our possessions and our money. In the New Testament there is no ban on private property or making money or saving or even enjoying the good things of life. What is forbidden is a selfish accumulation for ourselves, an unhealthy obsession with material things and putting our trust in riches. What promises security leads to perpetual insecurity and leads us away from God (Matthew 7:9-24). Generous giving is the appropriate response to the generosity of God and the needs of others around us. It is also the best way to break the hold of materialism in our lives.

Next, we need to give him our ears (that is, what we listen to) – to be prepared to stop listening to gossip and other things that drag us and others down. Instead we need to attune our ears to hearing what God is saying to us through the Bible, through prayer and through books and tapes and so on. We offer him our eyes and what we see. Again, some things we look at can harm us through jealousy, lust or some other sin. Other things can lead us closer to God. Rather than criticising the people we meet, we should see them through God’s eyes and ask, ‘How can I be a blessing to that person?’

Then we need to give him our mouths. The apostle James reminds us what a powerful instrument the tongue is (James 3:1-12). We can use our tongues to destroy, to deceive, to curse, to gossip or to draw attention to ourselves. Or we can use our tongues to worship God and to encourage others. Further, we offer him our hands. We can use our hands either to take for ourselves or to give to others in practical acts of service. Finally, we offer him our sexuality. We can either use our sexuality for our own self-gratification or we can reserve it for the good and pleasure of our marriage partner.

We cannot pick and choose. Scripture says, ‘Present your bodies…’ – that is every part of us. The extraordinary paradox is that as we give him everything, we find freedom. Living for ourselves is slavery; but ‘his service is perfect freedom’ (as the Book of Common Prayer puts it).

‘. . . as living sacrifices’
There will be a cost to doing all this. It may involve some sacrifice. As the commentator William Barclay put it, ‘Jesus came not to make life easy but to make men great.’ We have to be prepared to go God’s way and not ours. We have to be willing to give up anything in our lives which we know is wrong and put things right where restitution is required, and we need to be willing to fly his flag in a world that may be hostile to the Christian faith.
In many parts of the world, being a Christian involves physical persecution. More Christians have died for their faith in this century than in any other. Others are imprisoned and tortured. We, in the free world, are privileged to live in a society where Christians are not persecuted. The criticism and mocking we may receive are hardly worth mentioning compared to the suffering of the early church and the persecuted church today.

Nevertheless, our faith may involve making sacrifices. For example, I have a friend who was disinherited by her parents when she became a Christian. One couple had to sell their home because they felt that as Christians they must let the Inland Revenue know that over the years they had not been entirely honest in their tax returns.

I know one couple who were sleeping together before they became Christians. When they began to look at the Christian faith, they realised that this would have to change if they put thier faith in Christ. For many months they wrestled with it. Eventually they both became Christians and decided that from that moment they would stop sleeping together. There was a sacrifice involved for them, although they do not see it in that way. God has blessed them richly with a happy marriage and four wonderful children. But at the time there was a cost involved.

WHY SHOULD WE DO IT?

• What God has planned for our future
God loves us and wants the very best for our lives. He wants us to entrust our lives to him so that we can ‘test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will’ (Romans 12:2).

I sometimes think that the chief work of the devil is to give people a false view of God. The Hebrew word for ‘Satan’ means ‘slanderer’. He slanders God, telling us that he is not to be trusted. He tells us God is a spoilsport and that he wants to ruin our lives.

Often we believe these lies. We think that if we trust our Father in heaven with our lives he will take away all our enjoyment in life. Imagine a human parent like that. Suppose one of my kids were to come to me and say, ‘Dad, I want to give you my day to spend it together however you want.’ (not a hint Bex) Of course, I would not say, ‘Right, that is what I have been waiting for. You can spend the day locked in the cupboard!’

It is absurd even to consider that God would treat us worse than a human parent. He loves us more than any human parent and wants the very best for our lives. His will for us is good. He wants the very best (as every good parent does). It is pleasing – it will please him and us in the long run. It is perfect – we will not be able to improve on it.

Sadly, people feel they can improve on it. They think, ‘I can do a little better than God. God is a bit out of touch. He hasn’t caught up with the modern world and the things that we enjoy. I think I will run my own life and keep God well out of it.’ But we can never do a better job than God, and sometimes we end up making an awful mess.
Some people insist on running their own lives. They do not want any help, they will not trust God, and often it ends in tears. But God gives us a second chance. …If we will trust God with our lives, then he will show us what his will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.

• What God has done for us ‘In view of Gods mercy…’

The little sacrifices he asks us to make are nothing when we compare them with the sacrifice that God made for us. C. T. Studd, the nineteenth-century England cricket captain who gave up wealth and comfort (and cricket!) to serve God in inland China, once said, ‘If Jesus Christ be God, and he died for me, nothing is too hard for me to do for him.

The writer of Hebrews urges us, ‘Let us run with perseverance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus the pioneer and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God’ (Hebrews 12:1-2, RSV).

As we look at Jesus, God’s only Son who ‘endured the cross’, we see how much God loves us. It is absurd not to trust him. If God loves us so much we can be sure he will not deprive us of anything good. Paul wrote, ‘He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all – how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?’ (Romans 8:32).

Our motivation for living the Christian life is the love of the Father.
Our model in life is the example of the Son.
The means by which we can live this life is the power of the Holy Spirit.

How great God is and what a privilege it is to walk in a relationship with him, to be loved by him and to serve him all our lives. It is the best, most rewarding, fulfilling, meaningful, satisfying way to live. Indeed it is here we find the answers to the great questions of life.